99 Reasons Why

Hello you.

Today (March 19th) sees the publication of the new Caroline Smailes book, '99 REASONS WHY' and it's a book with a difference. I know people always say that, but this time it's true.

 You may have seen Caroline speaking on BBC Breakfast the other week (as well as other media sources to be found recently on Caroline's blog here) and I think it's great that the concept that makes it unique in today's electronic publishing world is being bandied about and discussed.

To capitalize on the wonders of technology '99 REASONS WHY' comes with 9 different endings which readers can navigate through using multiple choice questions (if you own a Kindle) or via a spinning story wheel (if you own an iPad or iPhone). But there are also two additional endings that are not included in the book. 

One of these endings is directly below, the other one will be handwritten by Caroline and auctioned for charity.

If you are wondering whether it's okay to read this before reading the book (which you really should, by the way, because it is ace) don't worry - there are still loads of endings to choose from in the ebook. Why not collect them all ???

You can head over to Caroline's website to learn more, or you could just pop over to Amazon right now and purchase a truly brilliant piece of work by an author at the top of her game.

Thank you....and now, for your reading pleasure, I present:

99: the reason why I was only worth ninety-nine quid

It’s been six days since the little girl in the pink coat went missing and me Uncle Phil’s in me bedroom. We’ve been watching the little girl in the pink coat’s mam on the news. She was appealing to the public for witnesses.

‘Didn’t realise she had a mam,’ I says, looking at me telly.

‘Everyone’s got a mam, pet,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

‘She sold her story to The Sun,’ I says, looking at me telly.

‘Got a few quid,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

I nod.

‘She wanted nowt to do with that bairn before all this,’ me Uncle Phil says, looking at me telly.

‘Do you know where she is?’ I asks me Uncle Phil.

‘Belle?’ me Uncle Phil asks me.

I nod.

‘She’s safe,’ me Uncle Phil says to me. ‘Your mam’s keeping an eye on her.’

‘Can I be her mam?’ I asks me Uncle Phil.

‘No, pet, you’re a filthy whore,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

I nod.

‘Can you make Andy Douglas come back, Uncle Phil?’ I asks me Uncle Phil.

Me Uncle Phil shakes his head.

‘I love him,’ I tell me Uncle Phil.

‘Andy Douglas is your brother, pet. You didn’t seriously think Princess Di was your mam, did you?’ 
me Uncle Phil asks me.

I nod.

‘You’re a cradle snatcher just like your mam,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

I nod.

‘Your mam miscarried when she found out I’d been banging Betty Douglas. Betty was expecting you,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

I don’t speak.

‘When you was born, your mam went mad and I ended up buying you from Betty Douglas for ninety-nine quid,’ me Uncle Phil says.

‘Ninety-nine quid?’ I asks me Uncle Phil.

‘I paid a hundred but got a quid change for some chips for your mam and dad’s tea,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

‘You bought me?’ I asks me Uncle Phil.

I’m a little bit sick in me mouth.

‘It was the right thing to do,’ me Uncle Phil says to me. ‘I got Betty Douglas pregnant straight away with Andy.’

‘I’m pregnant,’ I says to me Uncle Phil. ‘I’m pregnant with me brother’s baby,’ I says, and then I throws up on me purple carpet.

‘You’re a filthy whore,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

‘What am I going to do?’ I asks me Uncle Phil.

‘You’re going to have the baby,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

‘Have me brother’s baby?’ I asks me Uncle Phil.

‘Then I’m giving it to Betty Douglas to bring up,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

‘You what?’ I says to me Uncle Phil.

‘It’s the right thing to do,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

‘I can’t—’ I says to me Uncle Phil.

‘It’s either that or I’ll make you disappear,’ me Uncle Phil says to me.

I don’t speak.

I’m thinking, they’re all a bunch of nutters.


That is just one of the 99 Reasons Why this book is special. Proper uniquely special. In typical Caroline Smailes fashion she is able to peer through the murky windows of fractured suburbia and present her flawed but engaging characters in a manner to make you almost believe it was happening right now in a council estate near you...

And now for something completely different

Hello You.
Just popped in to lay up some pics I've been working on of late. There is a germ of an idea that I am currently fleshing out, but after Freaks! rekindled my love for drawing (esp comic stuff, which is where I cut my teeth) I thought that it was an avenue that was probably long overdue for a visit. Nothing may come of this as I have a tendency to flit around from idea to idea like a flutterby, but you never know...

This here fella is called Wiley, and based in a large part on my boy.

And this big chap is his mate, Brew, a polar bear in case you were wondering.
As I said, this is just me mucking around at the moment, for the most part it's me seeing if I've still got it.

thanks
DC

Rise, Lazarus, Rise!

Hello you.

Just wanted to pen a quickie blog post following the release of the third book in the Cornelius Quaint Chronicles, The Lazarus Curse - available right now on ebook exclusive for a mere £2.49 and I make this personal guarantee to you right now - it is well worth you spending your hard earned!

If you don't believe me (and let's face it, I'm biased so why should you?) take a look at what some very nice people have already said about The Lazarus Curse - and it's only been out a week!

I am dead chuffed that it's getting a warm reception thus far, and yes, I know it's too early in the day to start planning my retirement villa in Australia, but this is my favourite Quaint story so far - and perhaps either by definition or just plain old luck it also happens to be the best written book in the series so far, so if people are liking it, then I know I have done a good job.

Cornelius Quaint is a conjuror that has become bound to Fate, and it seems that as much as he tries to avoid it, he is unable to control the path that he is walking on. Where that path will ultimately take him I cannot reveal as yet (well...until the release of the 4th book in the series (and possibly the last if CQ doesn't make it to the last page) which is called The Romulus Equation and it will be released possibly early next year or maybe even later this one. At the moment things are still wide open in that area for reasons that may or may not be made public knowledge any time soon...

A reminder that there is a promotion going on at the moment over on the new Quaint blog, as well as on Twitter and Facebook, to read a brand new and exclusive Quaint serial and learn how you could win a free copy of The Lazarus Curse, amongst other prizes, so please do pop along and see what it's all about.

It won't be the same without you (yes, YOU madam!).

Peace Out.

Quaint Expectations

Hello you.
I just popped on today to let you know about the things going on in the world of the interweb featuring Cornelius Quaint at the moment. It's all part of a 5 week campaign to help promote the release of the 3rd book in the Cornelius Quaint Chronicles, The Lazarus Curse which was released today, 20th February.

 I have enlisted a few kind folk to help me spread the word blogwise, such as Caroline Smailes, Nik Perring, Bob Burke and even my illustrious publisher, Mr Scott Pack, and as well as all that there is something a bit special going down at Quaint's new blog as well as on his Twitter feed (@CorneliusQuaint) and his Facebook page.

Basically, if you pop on over to the new blog you will see the first part in a brand new exclusive story that will continue to be revealed each Monday and Wednesday at 11:00 AM GMT. At the cliffhanger ending to each of Wednesday's episodes, Quaint's life will hang in the balance, and it can only be saved by YOU kind folk, or reasonable facsimiles of yourselves. Not by the giving of money (although, it is rarely refused) not by the offering of your firstborn (do you know how expensive they are to run?) nor even will you have to offer your hand (or any other part of your anatomy) in marriage (and/or) civil partnership to Cornelius Quaint himself. No, sir. No, madam.

All you need to do is drop by the blog at 11AM on Wednesday 22nd February which will take you then to a link on Quaint's new Facebook page, where you will see a question, as well as a code that needs to be deciphered in order to answer it.Sounds simple, right? And it is. It couldn't be any simpler if it were designed by a three year-old marmoset missing three of the digits on its right hand with only a half-eaten crayon and a piece of slate to write on. Once you have used the Cornelius Cipher to decode the message, simply Follow @CorneliusQuaint on Twitter and send him a Direct Message including the hashtag #LazarusCurse and your answer.

Remember....there are PRIZES TO BE WON!!!!

I have called The Lazarus Curse my THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK. It's got tons of action and peril, as anyone that has read the first two books will expect - nay, demand - as well as the events in this book, whilst having an obvious link to the events in the previous two, also begin to show what the series has always been about, ever since I sat at a keyboard and began typing away. Sometimes I made it up as I went along, but sometimes I knew exactly what I needed to show/tell to lay the seeds for the future. The sharp-eyed amongst you that have read the books will see a lot of threads paying off, whilst unearthing some brand new ones. There is also something that happens that I hope will shock some people, and I KNOW it will shock others. This something I um-ed and ah-ed about for some time, rewriting bits of it several times because I felt guilty what I was about to do. In the end, I stuck to my guns and I think the story is better for it.

But it's the first time that Quaint has gone exclusively on ebook, so I am hoping that all the nice girls and boys that got shiny new Kindles and iPads for Christmas will think of me when they are scanning through the lists of reasonably-priced ebooks!

If you are one of those yet to take the plunge, fear not - for over the next few weeks you will be able to win a FREE copy of The Lazarus Curse, amongst other prizes.

I do this...all of this...only because I care.

Blonde Ambition (not that I'm blonde) (and not that I've got anything against people who are) (it was just a clever title that.....Oh, suit yourself!)

Hello you. 

This post doesn't contain any rapier-sharp observations or the usual whipcrackin' lyrical satire that you might normally associate with me - or not - which, let's be honest, is probably far more likely. But what this post does contain - which I think is just as crucial as me writing lots of posts in an effort to introduce more people to my books - is a little insight into the backroom cogs, pistons and oil that make up my author machine.

I'll be straight with you. I walked into this writing game way back in 2005 with my head full of dreams and ambitions to be a best-selling author, raking in millions and with a successful movie franchise in my back pocket. (Damn that JK Rowling. As much as I love her, she was after all single-handedly responsible for making me believe that a career as an author was a possibility, she didn't 'arf set the bar high. Measuring yourself against the gods, you're only going to be reminded that you're merely a mortal). We're seven years down the line now and I've no way near accomplished what I set out to do in those days of scribbling away in notebooks and learning how to write a query letter, synopsis and what size lettering to use in my manuscripts. I'm a bit older, arguably a bit wiser and definitely a bit less hungry for universal acceptance.

I had always been a keen writer in my youth, until I segued into my other hobby of drawing comic books, meshing the two things together on a variety of projects that will never see the light of day (if I have any say in it). My old comics weren't produced to launch me into the professional stratosphere, they were just what I enjoyed doing, an extension of my love of reading superhero comics (mostly Marvel, but the nostalgic in me has still got nuff luv for DC and the likes of 2000AD, Commando, Starblazer and Warlord). I wasn't in competition with anyone, as I wasn't aiming to be a professional comic artist. Okay, so I'd sent the odd submission off to DC and Marvel over the years (with some excellent feedback rec'd which really helped me get better) but it was fairly relaxed in that I didn't really expect to make a career out of it. 

Anyway, when I started to delve back into writing again sometime around 2004/05, I was given some great feedback from online writer's sites which compelled me to finish the book I was working on and submit it. But I wasn't one of those authors that had just the one killer idea and that was it. They say everyone has at least one book in them, but I had hundreds of the damn things going on, and it was hard for me to focus on one at a time. (I still have that problem to this day. As I type this I am revisiting an old MS from 2008 that I just couldn't get right at the time, and I still regularly flip-flop from idea to idea. It's a bad, bad habit). I also got into a habit of only writing 30 pages of a book, or the first few chapters - in other words: I would only write what I needed to complete in order to submit it to an agent/publisher. Once I got the rejection letter, which I stopped collecting once they reached double figures, I would drop that idea and start a new one. Now that is a really, really bad habit and one that I certainly wouldn't advise anyone to do....but it actually somehow miraculously ended up paying off for me.

Back in 2005-ish, I put the opening chapters of The Equivoque Principle on a website similar to HarperCollins' Authonomy, where it received some very high marks during the review stage, which in turn allowed it to filter through the ether to the desk of my current publisher, Scott Pack from The Friday Project (HarperCollins imprint, don'cha know) and I was elated to receive an email from Mr P asking to read the entirety of the book. I clipped my heels and jumped for joy, thanking Zeus for the good fortune - but then it suddenly hit me. Shit, I've only written about 80 pages and it's nowhere near completed! Yikes!!

Luckily, I had plotted the book out and knew exactly where it was going (including the direction of the 3 sequels). Coming from a comic book background, I was used to fast turnarounds, ongoing plots and series arcs. I knew my characters and I knew where I wanted to take them, and so I knuckled down, working well into the small hours of many nights to complete my first proper book. I wasn't really working to any strict deadline, and still had the freedom to set up lots of little things that would eventually pay off down the line in the sequels - See? Even back then I was thinking ahead. I wasn't encumbered by little things like sales figures or promotional campaigns, I was writing, doing what I loved to do, and even better - I was one step further along that path to success (or perhaps even acceptance - or perhaps they're not mutually exclusive).

As an author, I think this Yoda quote from The Empire Strikes Back describes me perfectly:

"A Jedi (an author) must have the deepest commitment, the most serious mind. This one a long time have I watched. All his life has he looked away... to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Hmph! Adventure. Excitement. A Jedi (an author) craves not these things."

It still felt completely surreal reading (and re-reading) that initial email from Mr P. He liked what he'd read of Equivoque and wanted to read more. My book actually had a shot at getting published, I couldn't believe it. It had come so far out of left field that it was like a dream. Could it really be possible? After all those failed ideas, all those rejections? Could my dreams for the future turn into a reality? Could I be as big as JK?

Well, no as things turned out and it was naive of me to even entertain the thought, but hey - that's called having ambition, sue me. Of course, now I know that anyone that writes to be successful isn't regarded quite as highly as those who have a compulsion to write because they have the soul of an artist. My problem at the time was that I wasn't writing for me. I was looking for a hit. I still have elements of that problem even today. I find that I work best when I don't have any dreams about how successful (or not) my books might be.......I am not disappointed when they're not, but pleasantly surprised when they are. The best of both worlds.

Don't get me wrong, Equivoque sold, but certainly not mega-numbers. Assisted by being part of Waterstones' 3 for 2 promotion, it did okay. Just okay. It did unexpectedly well on ebook though, almost as well as the sequel, The Eleventh Plague. But no, I wasn't going to be rich and famous, and JK had nothing to worry about. Her crown remained firmly ensconced atop that beautiful wheat-blond head of hers. I'm not a millionaire yet, I said to my wife, my friends and my family - and I felt kind of apologetic about that for some reason. As if I'd let them down. But why? It wasn't their dream, they were just piggybacking off mine. I had no idea what sort of sales an author needed to reach before they were classed as successful, and I suppose that's a subjective point. Some might say I should be grateful that I was published at all, and that thousands of other would-be authors would sacrifice their firstborn child for a chance. I should know, I was one. And yes, I am grateful. Very, in fact. Being published and having the support of Mr P and his faith in the Cornelius Quaint series, getting nice emails from strangers that say they enjoyed what they read and when is the next book coming out, having someone randomly seek me out on Twitter just to say Hi, someone taking the time to leave a review on Amazon or iBooks (be they positive or negative). I am grateful for all of that, and it has not only given me a bit more confidence, but it's enabled me to put a foot on the ladder...

Let's be clear: every day I get to write stories about people that I care about, even though most of the time they seem to be put into perilous situations with no clear way of escaping with their lives intact. I am living my dream, but I haven't yet reached my potential. Not yet anyway. 

I know this to be true. I feel it. Every new book that I write (or every old one that I revise) has the potential to be the best book I'll ever write. That's very exciting from a creative point of view. And now that I am a bit more experienced in the writing game, I'm better equipped to act on my ideas. 

Just as a post-script, someone in a review recently criticised me for writing "You ain't seen the last of me" in my acknowledgements page of one of my books. It wasn't meant as a boast, it was merely a little tagline to say "I'm going to keep on writing because it's what I love to do"....anyone that truly knows me knows that I don't have an ego. I am a sensitive soul, however, and no one likes reading bad things about themselves - especially on a forum like Amazon book reviews where I cannot respond directly to the criticisms being leveled against me.

There. 

Glad I got that off my chest.

Next post: I'll be talking about this:

Released on ebook exclusively on 20th February 2012.......it's been a long time coming, but it's well worth the wait, I promise. This is my Empire Strikes Back....make of that what you will.

DC

New Year

Hello Quaint folk,
Just popped in to drop off this just-released pic of the cover to THE LAZARUS CURSE which I am reliably informed by my ever-so reliable publisher is due for ebook only release on 20th February 2012.

The Quaint part was drawn by mine own good hand with some stellar work as always from the brilliant Liam Relph, who I have been lucky enough to have been paired with ever since The Equivoque Principle. Liam understands exactly what the series is all about, and for those among you who are familiar with the previous covers, no doubt you will notice the theme: four books, four playing card suits as perfectly befitting our conjuring adventurer.

This book isn't going to print (unless there's a big enough demand HINT-HINT) so ebook is the only way that you will be able to pick up on events straight after The Eleventh Plague to find out if Cornelius Quaint and Madame Destine are successful in preventing the deadly bacterium from killing Queen Victoria...

(No doubt all you history buffs know that Vicky doesn't actually cop it, but come along for the ride and you won't be disappointed. Sometimes it's not the destination but the journey that counts).

On a purely personal creative front, this is my favourite of the 4 (Yes! 4!!!) Quaint books, and for all those grumpy reviewers who said that the series was full of unbelievable coincidences, let me say three things:

1. It's supposed to be.
2. You ain't seen nothing yet.
and
3. There's no such thing as a coincidence.

And for any of you who have yet to catch up with the very absolutely and totally FREE Quaint ebook short story released in December 2011 called The Quaint Christmas, here is a link where it can be downloaded from Kindle bookstore pour vous, gratis. It is also available from the iBooks store totally without charge because you're worth it.

Please continue to spread the word about the series.
It's nice to do this writing thing, but even  better when there's company.

DCraske, 9th January 2012.

Blatantly Yours.....

Hello all you lot,

If I can't do this on my own blog then where can I do it?
Some shameless plugging of some truly spesh bargains for the Cornelius Quaint e-books at the moment, as well as a v-spesh free Quaint short Christmas story, imaginatively entitled: THE QUAINT CHRISTMAS. It was first released free of charge in December 2009 and my hardy publishers at The Friday Project/ HarperCollins have decided to re-release it online. I'm glad about that, as a lot of people read it last time around and enjoyed it. It's a prequel to THE EQUIVOQUE PRINCIPLE, as well as a nice little quaint christmassy tale. Here is the cover illustrated by yours truly, plus the excellently talented Liam Relph.

As well as this story being available free of charge to you, the discerning consumer, the other books in the Quaint Chronicles are also currently at v-affordable prices in the lead up to the release of the 3rd book in the 4 book series, THE LAZARUS CURSE, released exclusively in e-book early 2012.

Continuing Quaint's adventures from THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE, it sees the conjuror attempting to stop a steamship full of plague victims from reaching Dover, before engaging in race against time that takes him all the way to Buckingham Palace before he sets off for China on a voyage towards his unfolding destiny.

Lazarus is another ripping tale of amazing action and astonishing adventure and it changes everything that Quaint thought that he knew about himself and his family. This is my personal favourite out of the 4 Quaint books and I hope people that enjoyed the first two will agree with me. I am looking forward also to the release of THE ROMULUS EQUATION, which ends the first story arc, and I think it'll be interesting for people to view the series as a whole, and see what I have been working towards for something like 7 years.

Looking at the reviews on Amazon (which I do sometimes to see where I am going right/wrong...) you will see that I am what they call a 'Marmite' author, meaning you either love my books or hate them. I can't possibly please everyone, but I do feel the need to remind people sometimes that my books are only made-up stories. The Cornelius Quaint books work best if you possess an inkling of an imagination and are willing to surrender yourself to the style of the penny dreadfuls of the time....

Anyway, some details below the Cornelius Quaint stories available from the Amazon Kindle store (and the iBooks Store also, I should say) all listed at VERY reasonable prices, I trust you'll agree.

THE QUAINT CHRISTMAS - this puppy is FREE!!!!

THE EQUIVOQUE PRINCIPLE (Book 1 in the Quaint Chronicles) - this is a mere 49p !!!!

THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE (Book 2 in the Quaint Chronicles) - and this is but 99 of your pennies!!!


I will post nearer the time when LAZARUS is out, plus also, don't forget that I also illustrate the Quaint covers and you will be able to see more of my comic art alongside some truly unforgettable stories written by Nik Perring and Caroline Smailes, in 'FREAKS!', due for publication in 2012.

I'm going to be a busy boy, with 3 books out...
Peace.
DC